Chips Dip. Lips. Hips. Personal Trainer.

Chips Dip. Lips. Hips. Personal Trainer.

Yep, that tells my story. But only tells of chapter one.

Now, more often than not, the vice for me is not food but a recreated thought process. Take each thought in captivity the Bible reads, bring it into the obedience of Christ. His ways are everlasting. True. Future minded.

I am reading a book about paths and how decisions makes directions and that makes paths. Proverbs guides these thoughts about my decisions. I am learning that each decision has it's own weight and direction. These weights pull us in a direction. That direction is our destination or a lost way. Either way we are going somewhere based on today's thoughts, plans, purposes. I am not about a 'woohoooo' life gratified at this moment. That is unaccountable. I learned that the hard way. I seek the joy, love, thankfulness though whatever comes what may life. Learning to lean upon Him, with thankfulness and beleif.

Thankful, so thankful, for my Guide. He reads my thoughts and if I yield, I follow His. Leading to peace, truth, life, joy, and everlasting life.

Have been applying these same Proverb principles to other areas of my life. Love the burden of it all, it is lighter and peace. Taking His yoke. Yielding to His plan. ahhhhhhh.

More than getting my running shoes on, I have been getting my business shoes on. Just bought them not long ago. Leaving little time for nottheaveragewoman blog. The path is a broad place according to Psalm 118. A pasture of grace. A prime place to run to Him, for Him and about Him to my sisters, friends and fellow blogchics.

Dear Friends, because of His love to me, He has used His Word and by His Spirit led me to various writers, speakers, and prayers of His daughters. God continues to lead me to women (personally, or though their works to Him) who lead my heart to Him in various times and seasons.

Lately, I find Him using me to lead women to His heart in the same manner, although a different flavor from others. I humbly thank Him and await His adventure for me in live and truth and word and deed, for His glory.

Recently, a dear friend gave me a book, A Thousand Gifts. She scripted to me "This is your kind of book." She was correct. The Lord proved the message, 'eucharisteo proceeds the miracle'. My test and story of this truth is to share with you for another day.

She Speaks Conference is sponsored by Proverbs 31 Ministry. I have known and read the works of Lysa TerKeurst but had no knowing of such a conference. If the right hand of fellowship is offered to me (Galatians 2:9) though scholarship to attend would be treasure; a true seeking of wisdom experience. To be sponsored by a book author that already has spoken volumes of life and truth into my life would bless me, and bless me indeed.

The She Speaks Conference came to me by the way of A Holy Experience's Blog, which was introduced to me by the same friend introducing me to Ann Voskamps works in, A Thousand Gifts.

She Speaks seems to speak my language. The woman language. The type of message the woman at the well shared to her community. Words Mary, of Bethany, would testify of His truth and love to her friends. Words of exhortation and encouragement I desire to give accordingly to 1 Corinthians 14:3. She Speaks conference intrigues me. I am sparked by an opportunity to attend by sponsorship. Therefore I rest in knowing, "The lot is cast into the lap, but its every decision is from the Lord", Proverbs 16:33 reads. Therefore, I cast my lot into the lap, and wait upon the Lord.

Until we meet again...

Laurie Bennett
©2011

Flash from the past

The recent snowstorm has left us homebound for two days, a rare treat. My husband organized everything. As we went through pictures and memory cards, he found a picture were I was at my heaviest. Shocker! Oh my mercy. Why did someone not smack me in the hips, lips?? I asked him, 'How come you never said anything?'

His reply, "I never noticed, it was a gradual thing, I guess. But look how far you have come." I should post it, but golly I don't feel good about the state I was in. And I still have a far way to go.

Maybe I need another picture taken.

Ready for a sign of spring and a spring back in my running steps.

Closer to goal.

Do I dare come out on the internet stage? I fear tomatoes and rotten fruits being thrown at me for not uploading since April. No excuses, only reasons. Mom of three. Wife. Employee x 3. Home educator.

If the average woman is indeed a size 14-16 ... I am so close to not being average anymore. Am selling my average closes. Wonder what life is like, not being average. I will keep you updated.

This summer, I did not reach my Never Summer Mountain goal...yet... But I am getting closer daily. Finally.

I have learned so much about myself on this journey. First, the Lord is always with us. He is real and very near. His strength is my endurance.

Second, I am for sure older. The metabolic rate of my body is nothing. I was feeding it as if I was burning as many calories as my cute construction man, Brian James. Who am I kidding?

But I have learned, I am content with less and better foods. Seafood is now my friend. (which makes Brian very happy..he loves seafood) My steamer is a huge blessing. I put my frozen fish/seafood/chicken in my steamer with some veggies and wa-lah, I have lunch. I have cut red meat out except once/twice a week. Still walking and love it.

The Springfield Turkey Trot is coming up. I am excited to try again. I am lighter than last year. I am stronger than last year. I am mentally better than last year.

Am I am runner? Not yet.

I am excited about the weight loss I have experienced. Any pound from here on out is un-chartered territory as the last amount pounds are pounds I have lost over and over. Remember, I went from a size 2/4, a pregnancy, then a size 12/14. Then bigger. Then back. Then up. Then down. Around and around the diet wheel I have spun. Until now....

I was asked my goal weight was not too long ago. Honestly, I reported that I did not know. I have never been there to see what my body would respond to. So, we will see. One pound at a time. One day at a time.

There is a big difference though between this time and all the rest. Because of the Lord, I have not given up. I have reached the weight I was at 5 pounds ago, about 12 different times. The 'littler' clothes in my closet all stop at the size I am now. There are no smaller. There are no size mediums or smalls in my closet. If there are, it is because my teen daughters put away laundry in the wrong closet.

I ALWAYS quit me. When I reached that 'number' on the scale, I always quit before. Until now.

In April, the Lord spoke to my heart. It was a totally different issue that He spoke this matter to my heart, but it applied to many areas of my life. "Laurie, my daughter, I was for you all along."

He watched from the sideline as I quit running to my touchdown with only a few yards to go. He watched me fall, stumble, and run to the sideline of life. Turn to food, comfort, bad habits, self-comfort, and hide all over again. Time and time again.

If God is for you, who can be against you? The Bible reads.

I thank Him. He loves. He cheers. He is for me.

Therefore, I can do it. I can keep going.

Until next time ...

Still moving through ...

It seems that losing some extra weight in Feb and March was almost impossible. The scale did not move but the clothes are fitting much looser! The heart is recovering much faster. And the lungs are healthier as I can take in more air to continue. ENDURANCE... yeah!

My daughter Brooke and daughter Faithe have been working out with me. My eldest works out at a nearby place with her coworkers, although has a paid membership with her family at the only gym in Lebanon ...(hint, hint, Lindsey .. come on over and work out with us! )

Anyway, my Brooke and I have the same trainer. He is an athlete trainer and I think I am his only non-athlete client. Anyway she is a softball nut, and he is working to assist her improve her batting and fielding. Let me just say, this teenager daughter of mine, does not have much up on me. :) We are traveling every weekend for softball and her team took 2nd at the last tournament.

She can now flip a tire, 18 times in a minute, and I am up to 17. YEAH for Bennett chics. Her form is better than mine and she has some guns for biceps, and she lifts more weights that I, but when it comes to the functional part of our work out, I can keep up!

Faithe has been working out as well. Her trainer Brandi inspires her. Faithe is the cutest little kick-boxer there is! Kuddos to her for attending the last 4 kick boxing classes each Monday night and being the youngest and cutest ever! She is working out a lot....

I have not lost more weight (according to the scale), but have maintained and have for sure when down in clothes size. My man says I have lost more. YEAH. With spring here, I can work out more. In fact, the Bennett girl run each Wednesday morning. Before school starts here at the house, we get out for 45 minutes of a run/jog .. and pant up the hill. It is good for my heart to exercise with the girls. Tuesday is trainer day, Monday is kick-boxing day. Fri is training with my Melissa day, and the rest are on my own ...

Last week, I worked out hard everyday, and still schooled, worked at my new part time job, worked for Bennett Brothers, worked in the garden, and did mom/wife/house/taxi/common-stuff-for-everyday-women stuff ... I have more energy. And to think all those years, I thought I had no time for working out ..

The Polar watch is beeping for all the extra work! YEAH!

Garden season is here. I am excited. I have about 160 little tomato plants growing in my sun room. So many varieties! 65 peppers plants (they are for Brian). I planted 5 tomato plants yesterday. The early varieties of Stupice and Trip and they went into my raised bed. I am harvesting radishes now, and the spinach, peas, lettuce, onions, cabbage, and broccoli are all growing well. Faithe has potatoes and carrots popping up. Can not wait to move from comfort winter food to fresh-straight-from-the-garden-to-our-table food.

Be blessed ... Jesus loves you. Oh how He loves you.

Tire meets rubber band ....

Trained today with Tim. The Warehouse is open, the after-workout smoothies are yum and way healthy. It is the new happening place, you should check it out!

For the first time since my first workout with him, today I thought I might puke! I mean, I am doing all that he says to do. Rope day. Rope was good. Tire was good. 16 flips. I could do that ok.

THEN, he got all crazy one me. Tied me to a pole with some elastic band thingy, and then brought the tire to me and told me to flip it while tied up! WHAT? What in the world did you have for breakfast to make you think of this craziness. I am thinking your liability insurance man does not know you are doing this to your clients! :)

Ok, so I got 6 flips.

THEN the dork, untied me, but the band back around me and held on and said, 'Flip again.' Oh this will be fun, I thought. 'Be gentle', I warn. So, I am flipping and he is pulling me back and I am dying. 192 heart rate. and I am hearing birdies fly over head. Really I am! Black spots fill the eyes and I am going to puke! AND we are only 32 minutes into an hour long work out!

Needless to say, Tim Cole is indeed crazy, and I made it through, and did not puke. But the stars still circulated me for sometime.

Happy Groundhogs Day, I think I am going back into hiding too!!! I need a nap!

5K terror!

That was terrible. I mean it could not get worse. It is hard for me to even write about it.

My favorite weather man was calling for rain Saturday morning. Lots of rain. So I told myself, if it was raining when I got up at 4:30 AM, I was staying home. If not, I was running. Saturday morning, January 23, it was cold, but was not raining.

I did not eat the 5K prep meal the night before. To be honest, I thought that I would do better just on the fact that I was running longer and better than the last time I attempted. I was down in weight, so that was good. My mind was telling me this was going to be easier.

I eat an apple and a small yogurt on the way to Springfield. Drink some coffee. Ready to go! I arrive early because I had not preregistered. 6:30 AM. I set in my car after signing up and rested. Watched this crazy character warm up for an hour and a half! As I sat in my car, I would watch him run one way, run another. Come back across with this high knee bend runs, and back across again with lunges. Then when I thought he was done, in my rear view mirror, jumping jacks one way, and jumping jacks again. He was dressed is old time sweats with a sweatshirt hoodie. Looked like Rocky before a fight. He continued this for 90 minutes. I thought it would for sure wear him out. Sprint this way, sprint back. Stretch this way, stretch that way. It was for sure comical.

7:40, I get out of my car, warm up, stretch a bit and hear the chatter of the races. There are around 400 tagged racers. I hear all the things they are discussing and just warm my body. I was so cold, and it was misty. But no rain. Yet.

Women are called to the front as we will start 3:30 minutes before the men. 8:00 AM comes and off we go. I have a good pace, and start well. THEN, a cramp I have never know hits my side. I am doubled over. I slow down, still cramped. Tears fall. and more tears. I slowed to a walk. My first mile, and I am walking and being passed by a train of people. This is not good I told myself. So I started sucking in as much oxygen as I could. Still major cramping. It probably was not helping that I was in tears and between the crying and the cramping, I could not run. When I hit mile marker one, looked down at my watch and saw 18 minutes, I knew this was not going to be good. I thought that I should just turn around. But chose to keep on going regardless. I could not look at other runners as my sobs were louder and louder with every foot hitting the pavement.

Then, at mile 2, the cramping subsided, and I was jogging again. People were passing me on the way back, and I watch a flood of runner pass me as they headed back. I did not look back. I just kept going. and kept crying.

Between mile 2 and mile 3, two things happened to me that overwhelmed me. First, the woman that sold me the shoes, a 40 year old marathon runner, was guarding traffic and directing runners. When I saw her around the bend, and she looked me in the eyes and I smiled, she said straight to my eyes, "Atta girl, keep going." I lost it again as soon as she could not see me. Tears, a flood of tears. Why does this still bother me? Why does encouragement still send me to tears? I resigned to ponder that thought later so, I regrouped myself and kept on going.

Then, around another bend there was no race postman to tell me which way to go and I had no runners in front of me as they were all done, and only a handful behind me. I did not know which way to run. 'Are you kidding me, Laurie?', is what I heard my heart say. 'This is where you are. Still!' If I had not been able to see the buildings on Republic Road, I do not know which way I would have went. Because the first trek I made down this road before I reached the turn around, I was head down and crying and trying to convince myself to keep going. So, I did not know markers and I was lost. Behind ALL the runners, and lost. Tears.

I finally finish and see the timer. I would not walk past the finish line! So, I ran past it, 41:13. 15th from last, and looped around straight to my car and lost it again. My eyes were so flooded.

In retrospect, I did not respect the race. I did not respect the prep work for my body.

I am not running the 5K to win. I know I will not. That is ok with me. Really.

I am running these 5K's for simple reasons, but reasons that are mountains to me.
1. To Try my Body
2. To Finish Something
3. To Build for Tomorrows

AND, I have never loved the Lord my God with all my strength. Never. I would like to try. I know this is not what the verse means, as it means so much more than this. But my run, the journey does indeed build strength in me. And I will give it to Him for His glory.

A next race?? You might ask, ... yes, I am doing it again. My trainer says, no February races. At all. So, in March 2010 I will do another 5K.

I will let you know how it goes ... I covet your prayers for recovery. Emotionally & Physically.


P.S. I did not think it would glory the Lord at all to give Him this race, as I did my first one. So, I pondered whether to present it to Him. For this race was pathetic. I was by far the weakest: physically, emotionally, circumstantially, and daily, that I have been in awhile. But I gave it to Him anyway, because I know He will use it for His glory in spite of myself. He atones.

20 pounds!

Well, it is official, I have lost 20 pounds. It is slower that the trainer thinks it should be, and slower that I would want; BUT, it is good! I am down a jean size, and a shirt size. I can run for longer times. My heart can recover. I am not afraid of the cardio classes. I tried some jammies on that have been the back of the drawer for awhile, and they fit loose. I was happy about that.

The support from my friends and family has helped me the most. The education I have received from the trainers comes in a close second.

My trainer is almost opening his new gym so he has been swamped with prep work and I have not worked out with him in a long time. But on my own, I lost the 2 pound Christmas dinner weight. I was happy about that. I am telling you, fueling your body every 4 hours is a tool that helps me lose. When I can concentrate on that, I have much better weeks. When my to-do lists flood me, and I lose track of time, I am in trouble. I eat more, I act ravenous and eat too many calories.

My workouts are stronger. My running is farther. I am going to run the Starting Block's 5 K on Jan 23. I will let you know how that goes.... If I can only beat my time by one minute I will be happy! I mean, I will be happy anyway, but will be well pleased if I can do it!

Support Soars!

My mom ... I love her. For Christmas I had asked for a pair of new running shoes. She took me to Starting Block in Springfield, MO because she saw their ad on tv. I had never heard of this store before. When we went in, and I asked for some help.

Next thing I know, I am running barefoot on a treadmill while they figure my feet placement, arch, width, and leg running positions. Then they recorded me and streamlined it into the computer. In slow motion, I could see what my feet were doing. It was amazing. I could see how I was running. I could see how my running effected my ankles, my body. Then, based on that info, we tried on about 10 pairs of shoes, all in the category that the computer images represented was best for my running style. Slight prone, medium support. I was awed! I walked out, hearing from a women marathon runner, trained in such matters, that I had great running feet placement, and position, and all the things I did right, and all the things for me to work on to enhance my run. Was it inspiring or what!!! Thank you Jesus! Thank you mom for taking me there!

My man ... I love him. For Christmas, we had decided to spend no money on each other. We always celebrate our Christmas on Christmas Eve after the children are in bed. I had made him a present and give it to him. He had made me a present too.... If you have ever seen Forrest Gump, you know when Forrest is running over the US, the tee-shirt-happy-face man is inspired by Forrest and the 'Happy Face' logo is revolutionized. Well, my Brian believes I will help others want to run and move their bodies more as I get fit, lean and strong, so he made me a 'happy face' shirt, and wrote me the most inspiration letter ever! His support is apprecaited more than he knows.

My Brookie .. I love her. For Christmas she gave me a shirt that simply said.... Run

My Lindsey and my Faithe .. I love them ... They are helpful to me to give me opportunity and time to exercise and run and eat well...

Can not wait to break in those running shoes as soon as I feel well, and prepare for the Starting Block Resolution 5K on Jan 23 in Springfield Mo. I would like to run a 5K every other month until I am ready for a 10K.

Come run with me and we will 'Run, Forrest, Run'

Christmas ..... a lesson learned ...

Well, I learned a valuable lesson this Christmas. I still fight with temptation. And over Christmas Eve... it won.

My parents blessed Brian and me with a gift certificate to Big Cedar Lodge last Christmas. We still had not had opportunity to use it, so Brian surprised me and we took an impromptu trip to Branson on Tuesday the 23rd. Eating was ok. I had salad and soup for dinner, while Brian feasted on Big Cedar's famous menu. When the staff brought us gingerbread cookies to our cabin, I refused them. When Brian brought chocolates to the cabin, I had only two small peices. So all was going well. When we ate the next day, I chose good items from the menu ..

Then came Christmas Eve. I did well all day ... I was home finishing my wrapping, my cleaning, and decorating before my daughters and man arrived. I made snack foods for dinner and thought I could keep my paws clean. Little bbq smokies, meatball, veggie tray, cheese balls ... no big danger I thought. All of this food items I can take or leave. I told my family I was not making any desserts for Christmas Eve... Then, my 18 year old Lindsey made cookies ... for Santa ... Sugar cookies ... and well, I ate some. Too many. and felt miserable all night long. I had not had that much sugar in a long time, and I had just dealt with the virus, and I was sick!

Christmas morning is tradition for homemade waffles and fruits and sparkling grape juice. All sugar .. made me ill ... I was miserable. What was I thinking??

Christmas at mom's ... did better, turkey, beans, veggies ... and a piece of angel food cake. .. or two ... Stayed away from the pies, the breads, the potatoes ...but felt ick!

So today, the 29th, I still have not got back to the road of my work out schedule. I can feel it. Yesterday, I was hit with another virus. So I have not been eating every 4-5 hours. Have not wanted to eat at all. I have not exercised like I normally do. I am afraid to see the scale.

Come on ..Laurie .. start again ... stand back up ... you can do it ...

Virus interrupts diet

I was suppose to be finished with the crazy diet on the 23rd. But a virus given to me by my husband interrupted the diet plan. However, I did lose 6 pounds on the plan. Now I can eat meat and veggies except for potatoes and no breads. In a week we will add the potato and then in another week we will add the bread.

The virus knocked me around a bit and I lost a lot of energy that I would have rather found and used. I have not been sick in a long time. I know remember how glad I am to feel good.

Dec 20th, was our annual church Christmas play. Every year our church does a play the Sunday evening before Christmas, and our kids and youth are the main characters. Brian and I help with the play, so begin sick this weekend was not fun. However, after the play, our church has 'goodies' galore and yummy drinks. Temptation City! So, right after the play, I remained in the sanctuary cleaning, cleaning, cleaning. Did not go to fellowship hall where the food was. and I am happy to report I did not eat the feast of sweets. ..... distraction was a good thing!

New Diet for two weeks ...

My trainer surprised me last week with a new diet. A ONLY 2 WEEK diet ...

No carbs .. none ... notta one .. for two weeks .... no loaded coffee, no veggies, no non-calorie sweetened thing either. No Crystal Light, no diet colas, nothing that even taste like sugar.

This diet is to last until the 23rd of December ...

So far, I have had eggs for breakfast. No biggie, as I was already having eggs for breakfast. Protein shake after I work out. He wanted me to have my protein shake with water ... GROSS!!! but instead I found an almond milk with >1 g carb per serving, so I am having that instead of water. It is good. Lunch is some hot tuna with melted swiss. It is good. And dinner, Brian is making me some good lean proteins.

5 days into the diet, lost 4 pounds. Is this water weight? I wonder. I do not think so, because I am still fully exercising. Maybe some, but clothes are loose. And three people commented on my neck begining smaller. So maybe, I lost 4 pounds in the neck.... ??? Bodies are weird!

We will see how the rest of the week goes ...

Rotation Jeans

I know every woman has a pair. You know the pair of jeans in her closet that when it comes up for rotation to wear, you look at it and think, "You gonna be tight today?" "Did the dryer shrink you more again?"

Well, I have this pair of jeans in my rotation that kicks my psychy every time. Until now! last week, I tried on the jeans to wear for the day, looking around for a pair of spankx, although I do not own any, and say to myself, "Ok, here we go ... One leg in ... good. Second leg in ... good.. Here is the real test .. over the fanny ... yep .. and now zip ...YES! I finally have room to breathe TOO!"

Rotation Jean is loose! This is a milestone! This is a new beginning!

So, I take off that pair of jeans and evaluate the jean schedule. Baggy jeans (and I had three pair that were too baggy ..Finally! ) are off to the consignment store. I try on two pair of the 'once fit me nicely but do not fit now (yet) jeans', and tried them on. Fit! Let me remind you four of these pair are the same size of jeans. According to the tag... but not according to the body. Then, in the way back of the closet, I found a pair I had long forgot about ... tried them on .. and yep, they fit too. So, four pair fit. Time to hit consignment stores for jeans.

Tried on jeans at the store, some fit, some did not. But all 16s are way to big. This makes me happy. Out of the 16s forever. Tried on about 6 pair of 14s. 4 fit. One fit 'well'. One was too big. Bought two pair and left with a smile. Getting closer to goal.

Swearing off anything with strings or elastic unless I am working out. This is disaster, like a free ticket to eat more portion than allowed. You all know what I mean. You are full quicker in a pair of jeans then ol' comfy sweats. Promise you!

First 5K ....

Well ... today, I did it! My trainer was so wise to prompt me. The support overwhelmed me. My family blessed me.

Because I do not live in Springfield, I had to be there between 6:15 and 7:15AM to pick up my packet. Because Thanksgiving was at my house this year, I had to get the turkey prepared and drive the hour and twenty minute drive. So I was up at 4:30 AM. ...

But I made it to Spfd, was blessed by some text messages, and a play list my middle daughter made for me in her IPOD. Got my number, went back to the car and got nerves flowing. There were 6000+ people there! It was crazy.

On the starting line up, they have markers set up ..... 6:00 .....8:00 .....10:00 ...12:00 and 'Dogs and Strollers' .. At first I did not know what these where. Then it was said over the speaker, pick your time not to mess with faster runners. I look for a 15 minute marker. None. I know I can do this in 15 minutes a mile. I do that at home. When none being found, I stand in the mass of people at 12:00.

It is cold. 32* outside. Windchill at 22*. I have never tried to run in air like this. and the wind was brutal!

8 AM ... here we go.. the mass of people goes to the starting point. I have a tracker board on my shoe so when I hit the starting mat, my time will start. We get closer and closer. Crossing the beginning mat, I start my watch, so I can track myself. and I start .... An even paced jog. I start to pass some people, and think, "I might be able to do this."

The mass is running down National Street and there are people of all varieties. Young, lean, fit. Old, lean, fit. Personal challenge women like me. Teenagers with cross-country high school shirts. Couples huffing and puffing. Kids running along side parents. Teams of people running in remembrance of someone special. This made me smile. The reasons of people doing this varied so greatly it inspired me. An 84 year old woman, looking about 58, is the oldest participant and gripps my heart.

The first mile was tough. Normally at home, I know my track, so I know how far I have went and how far I have to go. Here, there are no markers. I have no idea how far I am going. How can I pace myself? This will not be good for my psychy if I can not figure it out. So, I start thinking I will gauge by turns. Having never run this course before, the only thing I knew is that I had 5 turns. However, before we hit the first turn, I am running out of steam.

Then, I see mile marker 1. Look at the watch. 12 minutes. I do a watch double take. 12 MINUTES!! I think I can do this! I am well pleased for a 12 minute mile for my first time.

I have never trained with IPOD. My middle daughter Brookie, made me a play list on my youngest daughter's IPOD and placed it by my purse before she went to bed. The song play list was perfect. I did not listen to it, or look at song choices until I started. Mile one to two I had songs with beat and hit the pavement to that beat. This made it easier. THANK YOU BROOKE!

I had to stop to walk three times, but just a tiny bit. Just to breathe a tiny bit. My heart rate was 199 twice! If you read down on my blog, you know about the 190's heart rate!

I did not like people passing me, so I starting moving again. I was better about them passing me if I was jogging, than if I was just walking. I am sure it is a psychy thing.

I found two women a tiny bit ahead of me, that looked like me, that I began to follow. Overweight women. My size. One was running alone. I would pass her, she would pass me. I would pass her, she would pass me. She was in her 20's. I am closer to 40. She inspired me. She helped me pace.

One man and he little boy were running along side me and I heard him say, 'We are in the home stretch,' to his little guy. But I could not see the finish line. I saw a mass of people coming back towards me as if to find a loved one and finish with them. I thought we had to be close. We had passed the 2 Mile Marker, but I was afraid to look at the watch. I did not want to play with my mind if it was already 45 minutes and I was not finished yet!

I kept looking for the finish line. Could not see it. Kept on moving. Finally, last turn and it was right THERE! This made me a bit upset, because I was saving a last big push when I saw the finish line and it could not be seen.

However, the last 50 yards, I heard myself say, "You might just finish this.. and you never, have never, finished weight loss battle ...until now. You will finish it."

Let me see if I can describe my heart about the finish line ... Well, as I making time towards the final turn, the song that came on the IPOD was Motions, a song about living with some passion! This song has challenged me before, I know the song. I have cried through the song. I did not know the song was on the IPOD, but the Lord did. and His timing!

I crossed, a sea of people were there. All talking, all glowing. I crossed. I looked at my watch 40:50. I looked again. 40 minutes. 13:11 mile pace. I controlled tears, as I took of my foot time tracer thingy.

Then, I looked for a lone spot. Ahead of me was a quiet place, a no-people, part of the park. Tears falling. Thoughts of "Lord, I just did it." "Laurie, you really did do it." "God, I really did it.", flew through me.

Then the next song ... the last song ... a worship song flooded the IPOD and flooded my heart. I kneeled. I cried. And I gave my first 5K to the Lord, the One that Helped me.

Kneeling, crying, in prayer and song, I thanked Him for all the people.... My family. My heroes. My trainers. My friends. Rewound the song on the IPOD, and prayed some more. Cried some more. Praised some more.

He helped me. I love Him.


That is my story .. Here are my stats .. onlineraceresults.com

Bib Number - 1969
Overall place - 3568 out of 5458
Division place - (34-39 year-old females) 217 out of 352
Gender place - 1700 out of 2984 (yes, there were more females than males run this race)
Time - 40:50
Pace - 13:11

tomorrow it is ...

Well tomorrow is the first of the 5K runs for me ... Turkey Trot in Springfield, Missouri. Since August of this year, I have been strength training, cardio-ing my heart, and began to jog. 12 pounds down, and moving more, eating better and preparing for tomorrow ... the first of many 5K's for me I decided. I have not trained for running, but have trained my body, with the help from my trainers- Team Cole. A lean running champion told me that it was different to train to run than just to train my body. I have called him a few times to ask him about breathing and endurance while trying to run.

So, am I ready for tomorrow morning?? I do not know. I have never had to 'get ready' for something like this. I have read some books on what to expect. I have prayed. I have trotted the tracks in Lebanon. I have gotten started on my weight loss journey. Is that enough?? I guess we will see...

I will let you know how it goes ...

Training hard helps emotions

Last week, I had two stressful days facing me. The kind of day that makes your stomach flip flop!

I went to train with Tim, and stated to him, "Wear me out, so I have no fight left in me!" Knowing that if I left him worn, my emotions could not vent out like I was worried they would. He did. My heart soared. Stupid ROPE! My arms still ache. But it settled my emotions. In a healthy fashion. "Be angry and sin not," the Bible reads. The work out subdued the anger, flip flop of the stomach, and I dealt well with the day. I am learning more and more about the benefit of all this exercise. It amazes me.

Sunday, in the afternoon, I trained with Melissa, and stated the same to her, "Wear me down." So she set up an obstacle course. CRAZINESS!!! Who thinks of stuff like this?? I wanted to sing, "I am in the ARMY now." My heart soared. 190 ... But the heart recovers much faster than it ever did before.

Even if I have only lost 10 pounds, so far, knowing that my heart recovers so quick, which shows how healthy it is tickles me pink!! This means so much to me. I can soar to 190's, but recovery time is short and I can soar again. Go heart muscle go!!

Yesterday, I jogged for preparation for the Turkey Trot in the morning and kick boxed in the evening with Melissa. The heart would not have allowed that before. 740 calories burned yesterday. YEAH! And still came home, made dinner, did mom stuff and had energy. 15 weeks ago, I could not make it through a day. Now, I accomplish so much in a day .... exercise = good!

First 10 pounds gone!

Finally!! It has taken awhile ... but the first 10 pounds are gone! 48 pounds to go. It has taken a lot longer than I thought it would. Trainers give me all the 'reason-ings' : "Muscle weighs more." "You are stronger." "Your body shape is changing." All true reasons...

Last week, my man, said he would be unable to identify me if he was going on just 'feeling' the arms, because they have changed shape so much. On Sunday, my 'Millian' took a picture of my changed arms with her cell phone. If that comes up on Facebook .. I will ...well, I am not anywhere near as strong as she is .. but I will have a payback!

Got the metabolic results back last week. 1860 calories my body burns just by doing nothing. If I want to make goal weight before Brian takes me to Never Summer Mountains, next summer, I have to have a deficit of 650 calories a day. Now this week, I am plugging into their menu design for me. Let you know how that goes.

Turkey Trot is 16 days away..... I am not ready. I am trying to get ready. I am jogging, walking, jogging much more than ever ... but this body has never done anything like this before. It has been hard. I am going regardless and will go as far as I can. We will see.

The other day, I was jogging on the treadmill, and when the legs felt like logs and the heart rate soared, I kept speaking scriptures into my heart. 'I can do all things, through Christ, who strengthens me.' 'I can endure, Christ endured.' 'I will love the Lord God with my strength.' I think that is part of the mental strength I have never had. I am trying to allow the Lord to process my thoughts so I can endure. Sure, I have endured hard situations, more than I care for, but I have never pushed my physical body like I am now. NEVER.

The clothes are indeed looser. YEAH!!

me verses the tire ... victory!

Last night on Biggest Loser, 'Danny' made the comment, "I could have never done this on my own. I would never push myself this hard ever!"

I know exactly what he means. Exactly. For the past 20 years, on my own has got me nowhere.

Tim Cole and Melissa Cole Mack, they mean so much to me ..... and, as my mom says, "I love these people I have never met because of what they are helping you with."

Epiphany moment today. I knew it was rope day. When I awoke, I knew the rope was waiting. The rope knocks me around a lot, makes my heart rate soar, and causes me to NOT breathe. A rope!

Tim Cole, big-trainer-dude, has me starting with the rope. Just like last time: "Swing it this way." breathe. "Swing it that way." breathe. "Swing it up." breathe. "Swing it around.... No, like this." "Lift it off the ground and swing." breathe. "Lift it off the ground and swing this way." breathe.... 35 MINUTES of a ROPE! Yesterday was an arm strengthen day, so the rope today, is like OOUUCCHH!

While I was doing this one side-arm-rope-flingy-type-of-thing, I could not even see Tim, because I am parrellel with the rope, and I know the 'bounce' of the rope is not even getting to him waayy across the room. This is the weakest of all the rope exercises for me. So, I glance over, and HIS FOOT is on the rope, while he 'sips' on his water with vitamins ... MEN!

Anyway, after recovery, as I am gasping for air and the heart is like at 190..really it was .. here comes the tire... Tire and rope??? in the same day?? my least favorite things. Because it makes my heart soar, and when the heart soars, I am gasping. I do not like gasping! at all!

So, here I am 40 minutes into the workout and first I am pushing the tire to him while his pinky finger resist me. for like 45 seconds or something like that. The goal is for me to push against him. and move the tire to him. Through that 45 seconds or whatever amount of time it is, he is pushing against me and throwing me around. 3 sets of that .. I collapse! arms ache. breathing is desired. air, I need air!

Then it is time to FLIP the tire. Let me remind you that this is not a bicycle tire. Monster truck type of tire!! He sets the watch for one minute. "Let's see how many you can do in 1 minute," trainer-dude says.

14 - I flip it fourteen times. He counts, I flip. "Stop," he says, and I crumble. If the Polar watch beeping system was not on silent, I would be beeping so loud and clear that the hospital would have rushed over.

He leaves me there and heads to the office. In his hand is a peice of paper that has his HIGH SCHOOL GUYS' times of tire flips and whatever other torture Tim does to them. There I was, 37 year old overweight woman ... right next to the top!

"Make a new sheet Tim," I tell him, "and insert me and that I am 37 and overweight and a woman and getting stronger everyday." The teenage athlete boy ahead of me, Mr. Wrinkle, I am gunning for his flips of 15 in a minute. I want to yell at the next work out, "Bring out the tire, Tim." ...BUT, next time bring it before the rope, and before the tire fight with you ...

We still have abs to go before this workout was complete. But by this time, knowing that I am indeed stronger, Tim, the big-trainer-dude, could have asked me to do 1000 sit ups, and my emotion would have carried me ..(tim, if you read this ... please do not try this)

Strong. Fit. Lean. That has always been my goal. a 20 year goal. I thank the Lord, for my husband for support, and Tim Cole and Melissa Cole Mack for helping get to stronger. Today was a good day. I am STronger I am STROnger. I am STRONGER. Colorado Rocky Mountains, I am coming soon ....

Tomorrow ... metabolic testing day ...

Define Encouragement

So, with all the emotions that plagued me last week, I went a searching to the reason why. Wed night, I sat alone with my Bible, notebook, open heart and pencil.

Ready.. God .. Go!

What I learned was it is not encouragement that bothers me. David encouraged himself in the Lord, the Bible says. Construction workers encouraged gold smiths in building the temple. Moses encouraged Joshua. The word encouragement means ..according to Strongs #2388, to seize, be strong, strengthen, cure, help, fortify, lean upon... I let those words sink, sink real deep.

So if it not the encouragement that has my emotions upside down .... what could it be??

In my work-out with my Melissa on Friday, she helped me work myself out. I am not mad that people are clapping per say. I am more 'not-liking' the 'looking at me'. I already have shame about what I have done to my body, and what I have not done to my body. The last thing I want is more people to look at my body. I suppose I think I hide myself, when I am quick, oh so quick, to talk about the person standing before me than myself. In fact even if they ask how I am, I change the subject to talk more about them.

Unless it is Brian, a couple of friends, my mom, or my trainer team, weight issues are few and far between discussed. I would rather talk about ANYTHING in their world than the process of getting fit. strong. lean.

Do I need healing??? Looks like it ...

What I realized is that everyone needs encouragement to accomplish God's plan. Everyone needs to hear, "Keep going!" Or as Moses says, 'Be strong and courageous,' to Joshua. In the new testament, Barnabas' (Paul's side kick for awhile) name is defined as 'Son of Encouragement.'

I need to realize that I can not hide or erase what I have become. Heal and move forward. I can only replace the horrible habits I have placed in my life. I can replace. God will redeem. I will pray. God will answer. God says yes to healthy living. God says yes to treat our bodies right. God says yes to strength. And I want to love Him with all my strength... and each little bit I gain .. I give for His service. To love Him. To serve Him.

This week, on Thursday, I meet with my trainer for a metabolic test at the hospital. We are going to see what the deal is with my body. Until then, I meet everyday with my trainers, sweating, and sweating, and sweating ...

oh yeah ... thinking that I need less wheat .. or no wheat ... will share later the discovery ..

Support and Emotions

Many years ago at my heaviest weight I attempted to walk Ha Ha Tonka's 319 stairs Spring Trail to the castle. It got the best of me. Winded me. Knocked me flat.

Saturday, I climbed those stairs ... and could have done it again. My emotions overwhelmed me a bit. I was pleased. Although, my weight is not falling down scale-wise as fast I would hope, my strength is soaring. I choose strength. I want lean. fit. strong ..

My trainer, Tim, tells me I have a great support center in Brian and my girls. He is correct. I do. They inspire me and help me.

This week, a sweet friend of mine, created a 'laurie bennett team' group on her Facebook. Support from my friends caught me off guard and caused me to swell with emotion. Why, I wondered? Why, oh, why?

I have a great man, sweet girls, wonderful friends, encouraging parents, family, and yet, when the focus is on me, I do not, and I mean DO NOT, handle that well. I do not like my birthday celebrations. I would rather plan a party for someone else. I would rather buy someone's dinner than them to buy mine. I am pleased to be the giver at Christmas, and not the receiver.

Maybe that is why the weight is still hanging around?? With weight I can hide? With weight I can escape attention? No, that can not be it ... Because, I do not want to hide. I want to minster, give, love, share, teach, others. You do not do that through hiding. My mom, my friend Tammy, my friend Melissa all think I have some heart healing to do. Probably. Don't we all? Jesus is continually healing my heart, body, soul. Continually reviving my spirit. I love Jesus.

As I figure out this .... whatever emotional trigger this is ...this why...... to why I am a basket case about cheer to me .. I will let you know .. if you know why.. please comment!

Today's training session brought the rope back. YES, the rope. Heart rate soared to 188! From a rope! But, it was better this go around than last week. My trainer, Tim, is good ... great .. He is just where he needs to be. I learn sooo much from him and his sister. God led me to a great path. I am thankful.

Stronger yet...

Knowing that Melissa was going kill my legs to day, I was glad for the mile over for the week.

She works me hard, but what I realized today is that I am starting to keep up. After a series of punch combination, her eyes were thinking I needed a break, and I did not! I kept on going!

But, when we moved to leg stuff.. I felt like I was carrying logs for legs. Ya know what she had me doing ... jumping on and off some lifted board step thingy. over and over.

I have had three daughters, all natural deliveries.... jumping of any sort does not work well for the bladder. I warned her of this on the first days, when she started with jumping jacks. LEAKAGE! might occur. no matter the keigel exercise.. leakage might occur...

But jumping this time, this day, was not leakage-scary. Perhaps that muscle also is improving. YEAH! for the nightlife too!

546 calories burned according to the Polar Watch.

When I walked in the house tonight ... the cheat treat was made by my Brooke. We got online to see how many calories a chocolate chip cookie is ...

perhaps tomorrow if the legs are working, I will hike HaHa Tonka in Camdenton.